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Sunday, 28 October 2012

Elder care rears it's head again.  Now I wouldn't be adverse to doing it if he'd ever been a dad in my life, but he hasn't.  His getting back in touch with me means that he seems to think I will be everlasting the dutiful daughter who will somehow reciprocate his newly found liking for his decades old spawn.

Added to the fact that he lives about 100 miles away and seems to be heading down the path of dementia, I am finding him very hard work.

He gets things wrong, he can't remember what he's doing and quite frankly, he's impinging on my life to such an extent that I am starting to resent him.  His ramping up of anxiety is also beginning to stress me out as he cannot just take what people say at face value.

He told me he had an op on Monday, so I booked a hotel on Sunday night.  He asked me to come to his and spend the night there, and although he is my dad, I'm not comfortable with that.  With bag packed to leave today, I asked him last night to read through the letter over the phone to me, and it's on Thursday.  That means I have to leave on Wed night and miss halloween with the kids.

On top of that, the hotel is almost double the price which is not something I can think about lightly at this time of year as it just isn't in the budget.

His girlfriends sounds thoroughly fed up with him, and I can fully see why.  Perhaps I am being unjustly unfair to him, and a night away from the kids in a hotel by myself would be lovely if it wasn't for the mega early morning to leave it at 6 am ish to pick him up and drive him to the hospital for 7.30, as he lives in the middle of nowhere.

Either that or leave here at 4.30 am to get down there.  Actually, that probably is the best option driving through the night before traffic starts.

I really don't want to go down this route as with special needs, 3 adopted kids and my mother who already lives with us, I have more than enough on my plate.  Where to go next, I have no idea.


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